When i go fishing and when it comes to taking pictures, i always let the carp, tench, chub ect... suck on my thumb to calm them down and it works, but how do you calm down a massive carp?
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 not sure about letting them suck things, well not fish anyway, basically just hold them in a relaxed manner, they are usually a bit lively when you`ve had then sacked up all night, try gently blowing in their face, but not if you`ve had a strong curry the night before. 
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 I find a rap on the head with a bank stick works fine... joke.....
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 Or a drop kick........... Do what the rest of us do...... . . . . . . . . . Fail to catch anything massive!
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hahahahahahahaha , yeah but after you`ve dealt with the girl friend how do you deal with the carp
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 Ive had a good few VERY large Gudgeon in my time I can tell you, they certainly are hard to handle, sometimes nearly wriggling out of my hand before I take a stunning trophy shot!
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 I can never get a trophy shot of the enormous minnows i catch due to my enormous fingers. Must find a better way. Otherwise as been said just handle in a confident manor and don't take to long.
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try photoshop Brian
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 .38 spl between the eyes and they never move again.
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I dont really think its right shooting carp anglers mate (well not all of them anyway?)
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Thats the Monk in hiding then.
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 nothing wrong with a slap around the head from a 40lber
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As long as its not a 400Ib
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or a pair of 38s
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 Felix - I bet you are gald you have asked that now! The actual answer is that most big fat carp are caught by big fat carpers who fall asleep on a bank swilling larger all the time, therefore its easy for them to lift them up. As for me, I just fall asleep...........
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