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A hard way back into fishing

I started fishing at the age of 12 , fishing for anything , bleak, ruffe ,roach and then moved on to bream , tench and then carp. By the time I was into the carp I had moved to whitstable , married and had a young son Justin .
Many years later , at the age of about 35 my marriage was over and I was a total p*sshead and the fishing had long gone .
When I was 39 I married Chris , who had a son Simon , all was fine but still no fishing.
13 years ago , Simon who was a 6ft 6in fit young man of 25 , dropped dead suddenly ,( S.A.D.) sudden adult Death , a defect in his heart .
After a few years of just numbness and plenty of vodka I decided to have a go back into fishing again, I did just intend to get a float rod and have a dabble now and then , but the carp had got the better of me and after buying a cheap ? set up I was back into carp fishing once again.
Six years ago ,another massive heartache ,Justin, who had been living in Hong Kong for some years , died of a drug overdose aged 34 .
We still did the vodka bit and went through all the pain that you get , as we did with Simon , but this time I carried on fishing , as some of you know Chris will come with me when she can , it has helped us come to terms with the two sad deaths of our boys, also we have met some great people through the FM fish-ins .

To anybody who reads this, I hope I havn`t gabbled on too much .

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