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Thread: Senior moments

  1. #41
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Location
    Hampshire
    Posts
    242

    Default Re: Senior moments

    Out of pure paranoia I always have plastic bag and some bog roll in my tackle bags, this comes from having a turd at a lake once 'off the beaten track' only to here a few hours later that someone had stamped in it. I could hear the shouting across the lake, I was mortified but held my silence. So I started to carry the plastic bag with me, with the thought that if I have to go, I can drop one in the bag along with the roll and take it with me when I leave, don't want to leave another trap for someone, and certainly not litter. Anyway, I got caught short one time, and despite the epic struggle of trying to hold on, nature eventually one I HAD TO GO. I waddle in to the bushes, drop me cacks and hold the bag up to my arse, you can normally feel your handiwork as a log drops into the bag, this time nothing, which was strange, I proceed to wipe, only to notice that there was a turd nestled gently in my underwear by my ankles, the bag had a hole in the bottom and I never checked it. I must admit that I froze, didn't have any idea what to do. In the end I gingerly removed my legs from my clothes, rolled the turd up in the boxers and disposed of them in the ditch. I went home. This is the first time I have shared my troubles with anyone. Somehow it's easier telling people you have never seen. One chalked off to. Youthful inexperience.

  2. #42

    Default

    That's unfortunate.

    The technique is to only pull your undies and trousers down to your knees then you can poo without fear of dropping a log into your undies (but checkout for your hood). This is a hard lesson learned I can tell you.

    Also, poo on the ground then pick it up with the bag, don't try to catch it.

    Alternatively take s trowel and bury it.
    PaSC Junior Development Officer ><((((°>

  3. #43
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Stuck on the chuffin M25 somewhere between Heathrow and the A3
    Posts
    11,495

    Default Re: Senior moments

    Quote Originally Posted by itsfishingnotcatching View Post
    I suspect you should reply "No"
    I did...that will keep him occupied for days !

  4. #44

    Default Re: Senior moments

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Cholmondeley-Corker (PaSC) View Post
    Alternatively take a trowel and bury it.
    Or scoop it up with your throwing stick and launch it into the middle of the pit.

    I jest btw.

    ---------- Post added at 13:24 ---------- Previous post was at 13:22 ----------

    Quote Originally Posted by swizzle View Post
    One crimped off to youthful inexperience.
    Fixed that.

  5. #45
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    ***
    Posts
    465

    Default Re: Senior moments

    Quote Originally Posted by swizzle View Post
    Out of pure paranoia I always have plastic bag and some bog roll in my tackle bags, this comes from having a turd at a lake once 'off the beaten track' only to here a few hours later that someone had stamped in it. I could hear the shouting across the lake, I was mortified but held my silence. So I started to carry the plastic bag with me, with the thought that if I have to go, I can drop one in the bag along with the roll and take it with me when I leave, don't want to leave another trap for someone, and certainly not litter. Anyway, I got caught short one time, and despite the epic struggle of trying to hold on, nature eventually one I HAD TO GO. I waddle in to the bushes, drop me cacks and hold the bag up to my arse, you can normally feel your handiwork as a log drops into the bag, this time nothing, which was strange, I proceed to wipe, only to notice that there was a turd nestled gently in my underwear by my ankles, the bag had a hole in the bottom and I never checked it. I must admit that I froze, didn't have any idea what to do. In the end I gingerly removed my legs from my clothes, rolled the turd up in the boxers and disposed of them in the ditch. I went home. This is the first time I have shared my troubles with anyone. Somehow it's easier telling people you have never seen. One chalked off to. Youthful inexperience.
    Frank Barlow, after an unfortunate visit to an indian restaurant the night before, managed to fill the hood of his one-piece-hood-attached fishing suit. While taking part in a match. Hard to beat that one.
    Better well hanged than ill wed.
    Søren Kirkegaard

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