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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Stuck on the chuffin M25 somewhere between Heathrow and the A3
    Posts
    11,339

    Default The Call of Nature

    I was out early this morning and TBH felt a bit crook to start with. After about an hour the persistent growling in the nethers became rather frantic and with motion sensors going off all over I was into the bushes double sharp.

    Jeepers ! I now know what an IED is having had one go off in my guts !
    So...that's another groundbait towel that will never see bream slime again.

    I never think to take a bog roll,not that it would have done me any good this morning...arterial spray would be nearer the mark.

    How do you cope....or do you live dangerously and accept that you might put through your own net occasionally ?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Furkum Hall, Sheffield
    Posts
    17,798

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    I usually fish evening sessions and by then I've gone 3 times
    PaSC British by birth, English by the grace of God
    I got the devil in my blood,Telling' me what to do
    (And I'm all ears), Britain's premier bread angler

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    The Nene Valley
    Posts
    12,139

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    EBS, educated bowel syndrum to the uninitiated.......over the years those of us that are better prepared manage to educate ourselves to dump outside of fishing time..........maybe you need a pencil and many sheets of paper to work it out
    Jerry
    PS Whatever happened to bog in a bag?
    That's about as big as a fish that big gets
    If you understand what you’re doing, you’re not learning anything................

  4. #4

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    It may be worth considerieng a venue with the facilities if you're feeling a bit crook?

    Luckily, I haven't had to find out what I would do.

    Just remembered a certain company has released line wipes, they look like wet wipes so if you feel embaressed about carrying such things, you can claim to want them to wipe your line. Mind you there are sveral people here that would use most of their product range to perform the function you outlined
    Last edited by iannate; 19-05-2013 at 19:34.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Charente, France
    Posts
    5,063

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    Spending so much time outdoors for most of my life I don't have a problem with doing what bears do in the woods. Toilet paper is for wusses. A handful or two of grass serves the purpose.

    As for EBS; I never managed that. Probably because I worked shifts for the best part of twenty-five years. I also am occasionally prone to the sudden urgent necessity syndrome, but always so far have managed to find a quiet spot to alleviate the urge.

    The biggest problem was when inshore fishing off the kayak. A two mile paddle to the shore and back or strip off the Farmer Johns and squit alongside, that was the dilemma

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Stuck on the chuffin M25 somewhere between Heathrow and the A3
    Posts
    11,339

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    Normally I make sure I'm unloaded and the safety is on before I leave but this one sneaked up on me. I think I may have to carry a pack of summat but I cannot bear the smell of Wet Wipes.

    I dont have an issue with a bit of bushcraft....its dealing with the aftermath.
    Last edited by S-Kippy; 19-05-2013 at 19:51.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Charente, France
    Posts
    5,063

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    Quote Originally Posted by S-Kippy View Post
    Normally I make sure I'm unloaded and the safety is on before I leave but this one sneaked up on me. I think I may have to carry a pack of summat but I cannot bear the smell of Wet Wipes.

    I dont have an issue with a bit of bushcraft....its dealing with the aftermath.
    Get a pack of those small polyester hand towels from the Pound Shop. They were three for a quid last time I was in. Cheap enough to dump and (unused) ones are great for wiping your hands on.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    south yorkshire
    Posts
    6,452
    Blog Entries
    3

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    I once remember fishing an eastern winter league match on the middle level. One of the teams had a lady member (good angler too) and one of the guys on our coach was drawn beside her and was plaiting his legs for a long period during the match as there was simply nowhere to get out of sight of her to save his embarrassment.
    When the whistle blew for time she got up from her seat and dropped her pants in front of every guy presant and did things right there in front of them and pulling her drawers up said "God, Ive been waiting an hour for that ruddy whistle"

    Dont forget the golden rule in winter either if you have a hoody type garment, rumours abound up here of one guy who forgot to pull it out of the way during an evacuation and when he was sitting comfortably afterwards decided his head was a little cold!!!!!
    Last edited by flightliner; 19-05-2013 at 20:10.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    New Forest, Hampshire
    Posts
    4,467

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    Joking aside this is a serious consideration. Where possible I like to have a right royal clearout before going fishing, but there is always the chance of getting the two bob bits, and when you gotta go you gotta go. So a roll of lavatory paper is the order of the day and a carrier bag to take the evidence away if it is solid enough.

    Handfuls of grass are fine but tend to spread rather than wipe.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    Suffolk
    Posts
    1,093

    Default Re: The Call of Nature

    There ought to be some water nearby!
    It's what your left hand is for!
    It's a short life, enjoy every fin

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