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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    On another planet
    Posts
    2,560

    Default When is help an insult?

    I was out with dad yesterday and left him downstream, there dad hadn't noticed the barbel in his swim although to be fair he was low to the water, a guy came along keenly pointing the barbel out which was fine but then offered to cast dad's bait to them for him. Dad's response was quite a firm NO which I totally understand. The irony was the guy was telling me his account before dad did and I stopped him short with " That's my dad" to avoid any awkward moments.

    Where do you draw the line when fishing and what examples have you had of unwarranted advice or assistance or alternatively do you take it all on board?

  2. #2

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    Maybe the chap was just trying to help, on the other hand he might have been one of the strange characters you sometimes bump into who just has too much to say.
    Sounds like you both did the right thing really.
    Imo help is never an insult if it's meant with good intensions even though it can feel as though someone is insulting your intelligence. You just need to tell the helper you know what your doing and try not to sound ungrateful.

  3. #3

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    If you are fishing and someone tries to help you, you should do what I do - you don't let them irritate you, you remain calm, polite and civil - and then tell them to ****** off!

    ****** I've been censored!!!
    Last edited by peterjg; 09-10-2018 at 13:55.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    Azide the Stour
    Posts
    3,781

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    I can remember fishing a very hard John Smiths qualifier at Evesham in the early 90s, fishing double maggot on a 23 to 0.06 when a 'helpful' chap told me that by fishing luncheon met under the far bank tree I'd catch lots of 7lb chub. After 3 minutes he was politely told to eff off and disturb someone else.

    Conversely fishing a Barclays championship on Makins I was spending more time playing fish than fishing so my feeding rhythm was going all to pot and a regular on there mentioned this and helped me get back on track by stopping fishing for ten minutes and just feeding, and I went on to win easily.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    North Yorkshire.
    Posts
    10,386

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    If it's unsolicited help, it's often unwelcomed, though not necessarily an outright insult. The vast majority of folks trying to help do so with the best of intentions. If you don't want "help", look like you know what you are about, don't be too young, or old. Don't admit to not knowing the water or to struggling to catch. All seem to be open invitations to those that just love being helpful.

    I hate seeing people struggle when fishing. I'm inclined towards being helpful when I can be. However, I recognise that many, for whatever reason, just don't want help. The frustrations for me come when people, that won't accept any help, fail dismally and go on to badmouth venues. Those that see you catching, ask for help, then ignore everything you tell/show them is pretty annoying too, especially if you've gone to any time or trouble.

  6. #6

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    I think help is never an insult if its offered in a good manner. Something like "Would you like me to help you casting over there?" would be much more appreciated than "Man you are useless let me cast it for you".

    If it would happen to me, I would probably tell him no thank you, but would tell him to watch me trying the cast and possibly tell me what I did wrong

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2015
    Location
    leafy cheshire
    Posts
    10,421

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    I always offer and in turn accept help and in the latter instance I most definately need it! I only offer in general terms rather than telling someone what bait to use and how to do it! I might however after my sixth specimen fish in fifteen minutes!!

  8. #8

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    It sound like the guy was a little socially inept, or maybe a little eccentric? At the end of the day it’s a massive mixing pot is society. I’m a little bit like a sponge I’m happy to listen to anything and everything, in particular about fishing. The man that tells you he knows everything about fishing is a donut, pure and simple, even if those elite that have won several world championships don’t know everything about fishing!

    So id of said “nah I’m alright” if I thought it was waffle I’d of listened to it and depending on my mood would of either egged him on to get more for my own amusement just stopped replying giving one word answers. If I thought it was good advice id store it for me to ponder over my cupper or pint later.

    When Is help an insult , to insult me - I’m going to struggle to get offended by someone telling me I’m fishing a swim wrong but maybe if they don’t take the hint and I have to say “look mate, I think ya talking ****, so lets just leave it here eh, ill fish my way you fish yours?” not often I have to say that to anyone on the bank.
    The world is full of kings and queens who blind your eyes and steal your dreams!

  9. #9

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    Passer by pointing out the Barbel, ok.

    Reply from angler.... Thank you, or Thank you, I've noticed them myself.

    Offering to cast for you unsolicited... F**k Off!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    There
    Posts
    5,042

    Default Re: When is help an insult?

    There has been the reverse position on this forum. I recall a beginner recently saying they couldn't catch anything and what could he do? Polite advice was given. It was pretty obvious that the tackle was all wrong and completely unbalanced as one major reason. The advice was rubbished quite rudely. No more advice.

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