That's good Kevin

R

Ron 'The Hat' Clay

Guest
I'll start it off. We need a verse from each of you.

"Away I now go, off down to the river,
Packed in my bag is stick float and quiver,
I'll mix up my groundbait in this plastic tub,
And hope it will help me land perch, roach or chub.
 

GrahamM

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I walk a mile and puff and pant
and then sit down on a nest of ants
I jump up quickly and scare the chub
Oh, sod it, I'm off to the pub.
 
R

Ron 'The Hat' Clay

Guest
Hey well done Graham - He's a poet and doesn't know it......:eek:)

Come on the rest of you, the next verse.
 
K

Kevin Perkins 3

Guest
Half way back he meets 'Amanda'
Into the bush for a quick right-hander
He staggers off, nearly on his knees
The puff and pant has turned to wheeeeeze



Getting coat and hailing taxi.........
 

Merv Harrison

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Location
East Yorkshire
The first time I went fishing was not very funny
At 10p per fish caught it cost me some money
Although really I was like a lamb to the slaughter
No-one had told me to sit facing the water
 
R

Ron 'The Hat' Clay

Guest
Whilst sitting there quietly with rod in my grasp,
I heard someone coming - and then came a rasp,
It wasn't The Monk with a slapper or tart,
It was Barney of course and he'd let out a fart.
 

Lord Paul

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Don't need a licence to fish me dear.
Why 'cos I'm from Bosina.
I don't give a dam about your rules.
Why, police not prosecute me they're fools.
That's why i like it here.
Get away with murder and given money for beer.
That's why back home I writes.
Come join me excerise your rights.
To come to this green and pleasent land.
Do as you please-if you need something -just hold out your hand.
 
E

ED (The ORIGINAL and REAL one)

Guest
Its pissing down
The river's in flood
Everything is covered in mud
To be out in this
Is pushing my luck
I think I'll go home and have
a nice hot cup of tea
 
W

Wolfman Woody

Guest
That was a bloody good one Ron!!!! Very appropriate.
 
R

Ron 'The Hat' Clay

Guest
Barney then sat beside me and made an appeal,
"Come on now Ron, I wanna borrow your reel,
I want your swim too and if you don't give me that,
You can stick it, you thicko, you doddering old ..... idiot."
 

Graham Whatmore

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Location
Lydney, in the Forest of Dean
First came the perch and then came the dace,
I'm glad I came its a lovely place,
Then on a bait the size of a marble
My very first sight of the wonderful barbel.

It isn't its size that holds me in awe,
Nor the thought of what else there may be in store,
Its the sight of a fish I caught on the waggler,
Thats twice this week I've caught "The Traveller"
 
B

Big Swordsy :O)

Guest
I went fishin' with Mort and we hooked us a migrant
Not salmon or sea trout
but a fat balkan lay a bout
We said show us your license
To which he started to laugh!
so I took out my 'chete and cut him in haff
And we both laughed together and drank wine from his skull
But the slob had the last laugh...our rods dint get a pull
cos him and his mates had caught all the carp for the pot
so we lined up his mates and one by one they were shot!
 

Lord Paul

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Me and Swordsy on the Trent.
Came across an immigrant.
He was using gill net this man.
Catching fish for the pan.
He looked mean and hard.
Up popped Baz "Lets have your card"
Did we call the police you think.
No just chucked the bugger in the drink.
 
C

christian tyroll

Guest
one by one the imigarnts came,
standing with my rod in hand,
i watched as they pounded my swim with 4oz leads,
i tried to reason but with no success,
i pulled out a shotgun and put an end to this mess,
 
T

Terry Comerford

Guest
The howling gales began to rip at the bivvy.
He'd used two inch nails instead of pegs, what a divvy.
It lifted off and landed in Leeds and is now fulfilling, six families needs.
 
K

Kevin Perkins 3

Guest
And to think that I thought having a 'pop' at cyclists might get me into trouble - should have known you lot better than that.....!
 
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