The best 'Fishermans lie' ever

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Peter Bishop

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Neil Maidments thread about the 12 lbs roach in Congleton(as told to me by a 14 year old in all seriousness)got me thinking. Whats the funniest or most outragous lie-or Fisherman tale as they are euphemistically often called- you've ever been told by someone with a serious face? And how did you react at the time?You dont have to name him or her, just recount the tale. Lets be honest we've all exaggerated a bit a one time or another but for some its an exact science. They just cannot help themselves and the lie grows with every telling.
 
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Peter Bishop

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Come on lads don't be shy. What do I have to do to elicit a response. Change my user name to Ron Clay?
 
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The Monk

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I was fishing all night last night love

I`ve never seen that women before in my life!
 
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BAZ (Angel of the North) aka Fester

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The Collingham 200 would have been good except for getting found out......................... It was even better when they did get found out.

Some of the postings on this forum on how certain individuals tackle a swim. You would never recognise these people if you saw them fishing in reality. It's good fun though (o
Poetic $hitehawks.
 
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Blunderer

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The bloke who used to run my local post office used to talk fishing with me all the time. He used to fish at a carvan site in Linconshire that I went to a few times. He claimed he caught a 6lb roach there.
 
Graham Whatmore

Graham Whatmore

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I once heard a fisherman in the pub say that the bailiff on the stretch of river he had recently fished was a lovely guy and very helpful!

Must have been on strong cider I reckon!
 
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ALAN PALMER 2

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I once stopped to chat to a chap fishing a local lake, the conversation turned to big fish /specimen fishing and he then proceeded to tell me that the AT had "sort of paid me off" not to send in any more catch reports because "I easily won the drennan cup two years running but it was more politically correct to give the award to the right sort of well known angler"
...........they were his words.I then made my excuses and left.
There are some great characters out there.
 
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Peter Bishop

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Good start chaps -keep them coming. Like Alan Palmers one. And whats more they never wince or blush when they are telling you.
Was recntly stopped going onto farmland where my club ponds are as the beaters were out and the place surrounded by tweed jacketed marksman with shotguns. As we waited politely and patiently until it was safe to cross the field my mate and I were treated to a wonderful diatribe about his match fishing success. Last year he won over ?2000 in opens, won a national title, never finished less than third in any match he fished, had the biggest recorded weight from one water and was a long standing partner of Stu Conroy amongst others (whose never heard of him by the way)
When he finished my mate just looked him in the eye and said, "so what are doing spending a Sunday morning kicking cow shit around while the landed genry shoot pheasants! No answer, just waved us through the gate.
 
Dicky (Angling Trust PAC)

Dicky (Angling Trust PAC)

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I was fishing a local pit for pike a couple of winters ago and I was approched by a matchman, taking a break from an adjacent lake.

'What you fishing for mate?'

'Pike'

'Any luck?'

'Yes, I had a lovely low double first thing!'

'I gave up pike angling years ago...'

'Why would you do that?'

'It got too easy, I had two 40s from my local club lake...'

What an amazing angler! I wish I was that good...
 
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BAZ (Angel of the North) aka Fester

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I went fly fishing one day. I struck into this massive brownie, it was the biggest in the lake. But because I had struck too hard the trout came off the hook and went flying over my shoulder. It hit a pheasent as it went over the hedge and broke its neck. The pheasent landed on top of a hare and when I picked the hare up there was a pound of mushrooms growing underneath it.
 
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Les Clark

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Its got to be said that Baz still talks the biggest load of bu**s**t out of all of them ,keep it up Baz ,nobody is takeing your crown .
 
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Peter Bishop

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I think Baz's story is perfectly creditable. Certainly more convicing than the fella in my club who told me he held the 'Welsh crucian record' with a near six pound fish or the guy who reckoned his pole had been snapped by a carp-which he hadnt landed-weighing precisely 19.5 lbs!
Eddie, I note we've been down this thread before but posters change and new stories come along.
 
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EC

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No worries Pete, just pointing you to the first post mate re: the Vauxhall pond!

10LB Tench in 1985 hahahahaha, a total beaut, I luvvem!
 
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Merv Harrison

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I was fishing a local stretch of river, had a bite, struck, and hooked a Gudgeon, as I was bringing it in, it was grabbed by a Chub, this was bad enough, but as I got my landing net ready, the Chub was grabbed by a Pike, after a monumental battle I managed to net all three together.

The Gudgeon weighed 4oz 2dms

The Chub weighed 6lb 4oz

The pike weighed 32lb 9oz

Three personal bests from one cast, and two maggots, my only regret is that no one was there to witness it !!!!!.
 
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