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This is a dedicated thread for discussing article: Regrets...
" we haven't had them all, or even all we could"...........absolutely true, but boy did I try hard!!
No, regrets are not good IMHO and from my experiences it does your head a lot of harm to continually think about what you've missed, or might have missed out on. I've reached 71 years (probably more by good fortune than anything else) so I can look back over a long period of time to judge what I've done with my life and consider whether I achieved what I set out to do back on my twenties.
I decided at an early age that travel was my bag and if I could do this via my chosen vocation then so much the better. This I did through the construction industry which saw me all over the world, living in some places, from 1969 to 1984. Obviously such a life is not all glam but generally speaking it was a wonderful time THAT I HAD PLANNED FOR MYSELF.
Without doubt such a life will always involve the opposite sex and mine was no exception! One meets, in travel mode, a very wide variety of women that one might not otherwise meet in normal life. Chance meetings on aircraft either with passengers or the flight staff happened many times, some of which lead my life in a different direction to some extent, but always with my eyes wide open so NO regrets. Let's face it, it is very hard to avoid meeting women under such circumstances!!
Marriage has taken it's toll with several failed attempts, but again never any 'regrets' with any of them or of any other 'close friend' for that matter.......
Yes, from a very early age I sewed my wild oats and I never stepped back from this at any time in my life, but always with quality women, and always with someone who had something to offer. I can honestly say the 'one night stand' was not for me! Yes, I loved women's company and still do for that matter, even to the point where fishing was put on the back burner for considerable lengths of time (God forbid!) but I always returned to it eventually...
So, for me, looking back, I've done pretty much what I wanted to do and consequently I can have no 'regrets'. In other words I dictated where I wanted to go with my life at all times and never shied away from painful decisions even if that meant a failed marriage. It all sound very straight forward but like all life it never, ever is, whoever you are, and I'm certainly no exception!
Perhaps my very poor childhood drove me on, or my own mothers very sad life was a beacon for me to use as guidance in my own life (she was 60+ before she felt safe and free to run her life), but whatever, 'we are all responsible for our own actions' and I try to follow this mantra where possible....
I have met many who have 'regrets', including close family, but when I really listen to the various stories from such folk I cannot help thinking, in most cases, they really did not make any attempt to avoid the, what came to be, 'regrets', in any way shape or form - they didn't make any attempt to change things...... As I say we ALL have choices and we can all make them IF WE REALLY WANT TO, but most, seemingly choose not to, and then find themselves looking back over a life full of 'regrets'.......................and that I find very sad..
..............and that's all you can do, learn from the mistakes of others. The trouble is tinker, is that some people WANT to blame someone else rather than take responsibility....but that's human nature I suppose.
Just as well we're not all perfect like us eh?? Add a smilie here...
Tee-Cee....so pleased to have presented you with the opportunity to say what you said (wrote)...I can tell you've been dying to get that on 'paper'! It was a wonderful precis which gave me - and others - a fair idea of your life so far and it does appear to have been PRETTY-BLOODY-GOOD! I liked your somewhat camouflaged account of meeting women on aeroplanes...the only club I'm in is the Moor Hall & Belhus Angling Society!
...I must know you then, Tinker!