In the trade it’s known as a ‘teaser’ and TickleTackle won’t buck the trend as they announce the 2014 launch of the all-new ‘TTC’ concept. Not a new range of products, but more of a completely new approach to try and raise the profile of angling to become an aspirational recreation. Of course, it goes without saying that it will be exclusive to the point of needing to sponsor the likes of Sir Ranulph Fiennes to mount an expedition to locate it.
However, in a complete reversal of the normal TickleTackle marketing strategy, it won’t be so ruinously expensive that you will have to sell your family into slavery to afford it. In fact, your ability to pay will have no bearing whatsoever on inclusion.
Intrigued? Well, you will just have to wait…
However, just to show that the TT boys have got into the Xmas spirit they have released a number of seasonal classic products to tide you over until the new year. Particularly aimed towards those long-stay anglers who stay out so long that they have their own postcode and/or appear on Google Earth, starting with:
Santa Please Stop Here
Allegedly humorous green signs to put outside your bivvy if you are planning a full session over the Xmas period.
Chimnee Pot
Hilarious plastic stick-on fake chimney pot for your bivvy. Complete with lifelike wispy smoke.
Crakkerz
Festive fun for anglers everywhere.
Contains a paper hat, (camouflage pattern, of course), plastic fish key ring and Yuletide joke such as:
Angler returning home from long session:
“Hello darling I’m starving. Have you got fish fingers?
Wife: “I’m sorry dear; I’ll wash my hands before I cook dinner!”
Boyleebox
An attractively packaged selection of 15 individually wrapped baits, ideal to hang on the Xmas tree or to use as stocking fillers.
Then there are the standard ‘Winter Essentials’:
Snow Chaynes
These are miniature versions for your tackle barrow wheels; there’s nothing worse than having your gear sliding around in the mud or snow, is there?
Hot Rod
Hand warmer-like attachments to fit to your rod butt. You don’t want to get cold hands when you finally do get a run, do you? Especially if your bait has been out there for a day or two, or three…or all over Xmas because you have been lying in a celebratory stupor in the back of your bivvy.
FyrePlayce
Imitation battery powered log effect fire and cardboard ‘marbled’ surround to stand in the back of your bivvy. Emits a cheery ‘real fire’ glow from its 3-watt bulb. Creates an authentic home from home feeling. (NB this is for effect only. Not suitable for roasting chestnuts, warming hands or other parts of the anatomy).
Smashyt
The bolt-on icebreaker prow attachment for your baitboat. For use when winter conditions get really tough.
Go-Glow
Have you ever rushed out of your bivvy in the middle of the night in desperate need of a bladder emptying session? Stumbled around in the dark looking for somewhere to obtain relief and ended up peeing all over your pod, or worse, in the bait bucket? Go-Glow is a discreet luminous arrow that has a standard bank stick thread.
Place somewhere appropriate during daylight, and then comforting night time guidance will be yours. (Please make sure your colleagues do not observe you when placing this product. Some scoundrels have been known to re-position Go-Glow’s in less than appropriate places!).
RunChymes 2
Following on from the lead set by the very successful ‘RunChymes’, which allowed you to download Xmas carols to play on your bite alarms, now comes the updated version.
Using the latest digital technology this links your bite alarm to your mobile phone and, when you get a run, the alarm tone becomes your ring tone, immediately alerting you that you are in business. Obviously this has huge advantages over traditional remote alarm set-ups because now distance from your rods is no object.
Subject to service limitations and providing you have a 4G phone, technically, you could be anywhere in the world. As well as alerting you audibly, the bite alarm also transmits a text message giving you its GPS co-ordinates. This is just in case you really have gone a very long way off, and have trouble finding your way back.
LureMynous and TynSell
Following the welcome news that the government is probably going to give the go-ahead for more nuclear fishin’ projects (well it sounded like that) and taking the theme of ‘glow in the dark’ fake baits, the TT boffins have come up with two new products, and LureMynous is the first of which is a breakthrough for those whose chosen extreme sport is all-night lure fishing.
These lures have had a radioactive coating sprayed on (using ozone friendly propellant, of course!) which has a half-life of several hundred years; it certainly won’t wash off during use. If you are at all worried, there is the option of ex-Afghan conflict NBG suits, and these all-over one piece suits will be soon be available in colours other than screaming yellow.
Now you can see where you are casting, even in total darkness, a positive boon for those masochists who insist on using a multiplier. You can watch your lure during the retrieve, and if it disappears on the way back – then strike! It must be in a fish’s gob! And obviously being able to see the lure as it approaches saves you from inadvertently winding all of the rod rings down to the reel, which is never the best way to find that you have reached the end of that particular retrieve.
TynSell
The second new venture is TynSell, which gives you irradiated bait, sealed in a lead can, with positively no sell by date. They will come in a multitude of flavours and colours, and never mind ‘shelf life’ these will last longer than the shelves they sit on. Nothing will be out of season; just imagine, you can introduce fish to a whole new array of ‘natural’ baits, (no artificial flavours, additives, or chemicals, other than uranium), using flavours that trigger Yuletide memories.
Old-time scents and flavours that were only ever experienced during the Twelve Days of Xmas are now available in boilie or pellet form. Standards such as Roasted Chestnut, Mince Pie, Advocaat, Two-Week-Old Turkey Curry, Port and Lemon, Brazil Nut, Candied Peel, Newberry Fruits, etc, etc, will now be available all year round, and of course, they all glow in the dark, too…
ReallyTwee
And finally, the ReallyTwee clothing division has entered into the festive spirit with a strictly limited edition range of outdoor wear in the all-new ‘Holly and the Ivy’ camo pattern which comes with detachable red berries for you to position where you think best.
Those of you who are not lucky enough to get their hands on a set of this season’s ‘must have’ range will get another chance in January when the ‘Frosty Bare Twigs’ camo pattern range is launched…
Merry Xmas from all at TickleTackle, and indeed from all of us here at FM too, have a great one folks!
